Christmas Frickin Eve Bitches!

Hello ladies! It's been a while. Yes the website has been dead for a while now. I have been super busy and have not had the time to do anything on it (I'm in high demand you know). Anyway, I just stopped in to wish whoever happen to stumble onto this site a Merry Christmas.

I'm here stuck at frickin work. Yay Me! I got here at 6:00am because i had to call someone in South Africa and they are like a million hour ahead. Oh guess what. . . . they did not answer.

I know people have been trying to get a hold of me to do things for them (i.e. Fix computers, make websites, cure cancer), but I really don't have much time these days. My company just got bought by Mcafee so they got me working like a run away slave to impress the suits.

Sorry for the randomness of this post, but I'm just killing time as I fake work on the fine Christmas eve.

We had a little get together on Saturday. yeah people got shit faced. It was supposed to be just a small thing, but we have so many friends (not bragging) that it turned into a kinda big thing. Anyway, we did a little elephant gift exchange thingy that turned out pretty fun. Good finger foods and plenty of drinks. There are pictures out there, but I didn't take any.

Ok I am bored now

That Kanye Workout Plan

So as of late (the past month) I've been working out alot. You know, trying ta get swole for the ladies in all. I don't really got a strategy since I never took P.E. weight training, but I've never really been a sloutch, and I pretty much got it covered. I tell you this cuz I think it's a good idea for all you flabby bastards out there to try some physical exercise for a change. Lift weights, ride a bike, join a gym (and go!), walk your fat ass around the block. It's really all about your motivation to better your health and the way you look (to the ladies of course).

I don't care how much you do or how often you do it. Just do something for crying out loud. Also eating healthy is good idea as well. Now I'm not gonna preach carrot sticks and light mayonnaise to anyone. I personally never eat anything that's green if possible. Plus I happen to be blessed with a high metabolism (and rugged man-pretty looks). Ok so all I'm saying is, if not for yourself and your health. . . . Do it for all the sexy ladies out there who you could be dry hump'n on Tuesdays. Now who's coming with me?!

Oh Ladies! don't think I forgot about youz.....

I'm just say'n, just cuz you bought that Tae-Bo VHS tape don't mean Billy Blanks is coming to your house to get your fat ass off the couch. Same rules apply for those without penis's. Get on that expensive ass treadmill that's taking up the whole back room and "west side walk it out" like them young folks be say'n.

Tho I do have an alternative for some of you ladies.......Two words......Stripper Pole.

That's right young'n, go out and get yourself a stripper pole. I'm sure if you already have a man he will get you one in a heartbeat if you ask. Hell he's been waiting for this day his whole life!

Now like with most things in life you have your different options in Poles. Your Built in version, your semi-portable with stage version, and your very portable "see you at my house" version. All very good and all very true to the life style. Also if you wanna make if official for me your dude, you gotta come with the outfit. I'm talk'n shoes and. . . . . what else do stripper have on again? (I kid, I kid) But I digress. Get the shoes and lacey outfit, throw on some stripper parafanilia. Or don't... actually we really don't care. Once you got the pole we are already living the dream. None the less, you will not be sorry and neither will the lucky fella you put it on and take it off for. I don't go to the titty bars myself that much, but if I don't come out smell'n like hooker spit and cigarette butts then someone was not on their A game. Don't let that be you ladies...





Wow! What a turn of events this post has taken.. Mer ha ha ha ha (evil laugh)

No news is bad news

So there ain't anything good happening so far. This summer better not suck ass!

Lets see, Bake moved out of the Goat Ranch (Yay more rent for me!!). We all know about crappy Paris Hilton so no need to go into that crap. If you did not see the Soprano's season finale....that sucked. I mean creative my ass! more like a fucked up choose your own adventure book. That crap had me staring at my tv like "WTF Mate!" real talk.

Anywho I'm on Goat Vacation so for now just watch thise videos that Tony and I found on the net.

HAPPY GILMORE RE-CUT


AAMERICAN PIE 2 - REDEMPTION


TASTE LIKE GRAVY


BATMAN - DEAD END


Last one.......

THE N-WORD FOR THE WHITE GUY

So, why don't you make like a tree and get out of here?

So I picked up a Nintendo Wii the other day. Well actually my boy "Shorty" hooked it up while I was at work saving the world. None the less, this bitch is Rad like Crew Jones!


I was gonna get a PS3, but That shit cost way too much right now and I already have a 360. What's cool about the Wii is the get drunk and bowl factor. That "Wii Sports" is hella fun yo! First you get to make little characters that look like your friends, and then you get to all make ass's of yourselves in front of the TV. Not to mention it's a fucking workout! Now I consider myself to be in pretty good shape (better than most of my friends) and that shit works muscles you didn't even know you had. My arm is killing me, and the first day my side was hurting like a BZ.
Yeah so... If you see one at the store, you might wanna scoops them bitches.

Can you tell me where you've seen these shoes before? That's right bitches! Them the NIKE Air McFly's son! I know you remember these joints from the "Back to the future" movie. Over on SneakerHunt.com these got leaked, and they think it may be a possible prototype of an upcoming release. Let's all prey they don't. If you know me, then you know I'm not a fan of NIKE at all, but if you wear these shoes your an asshole.



Over on SomethingAwful.com they had "Make You Own Transformer" photo Phriday. There are a few that are fucking awesome, but toward the end they get a little lazy.

Ta end this proper like, my girl Sarah shot me over this picture of the "Beer Prayer".
Read it, Save it, Love it, Live it.

I'm Goat

Just an update on why I hate you

So since nobody really wants to post anything anymore. I decided to reclaim my website. I'm currently redesigning the whole thing (gotta keep it ganksta homie). It should be done pretty soon. I just gotta finish all the picture and video pages. I'm also gonna be posting really short posts ta keep the site moving along.

Also I installed Microsoft Vista(Ultimate Bitch) not too long ago and it is making shit harder cuz I had to reload my who life onto the computer and then get all my driver to work again. I would go on in detail but I have a feeling most people who read this will not understand a word I say.

Fucking Cavemen!