No such thing as "Drama Free"

Well then. Where should I begin?

Hmmmm. . . . So as you know there was a little fiesta thing pop'n off @ the Ranch last night. Not as many people showed up as we thought, but there was still a lot. More importantly, there was hella alcohol in this BeeZee. I mean HELLA! I counted at least 3 or 4 big ass jugs of vodka, a keg of Bud Lite, 4 12's of Corona, and various other hard liquor and beers. Oh yeah and the 5 gallon jungle juice cooler had a jug or two of Bacardi and vodka in it.

Ok so back to the party. I have to tell you, most of the people who came I have never even seen before in my life. A lot of the people where Tony's co-workers and their friends they brought. Which is cool, that's what it's about. As long as we are all here to have a good time, and for the most part that's what we were doing.

Now if you came to the party or you heard about what went down, then I know what you're waiting for me the write about. Well I'm not gonna . . . exactly. All I am gonna say is that some shit pop'd off that should not have. Had my old white neighbor lady coming outside. Rookie cops surveiling my house (big up to my boy Shane for being young, skinny, drunk, & white when the cops are @ the door).

You'll be proud to know that I didn't cut anybody, so that's cool. Most of the incident was a misunderstanding and or could have been handled differently. Other parts did require some sort of knife play, but que sera. Yeah so moral of the story is: There is no such thing as a drama free party.

Anywho I'm tired of writing. Here's a couple pics from the night.

Get your Drunk face Ready

Hello everybody!

I Just wanted to give a friendly reminder that it's party time this Saturday. Oh and just incase, let me drop the info for those who don't know:

Date & Time
Saturday Sept. 1st @ 9:00pm

[There was a map here, but you don't need them shits anymore....YEE!]


That's pretty much it Bitches.

Oh remember 3 very important things.

1. Bring some drinks, cuz you can never have enough!!!

2. Eat before you come, cuz we ain't feedin you drunk bitches!!!

3. I'll cut you if you fuck up my night!!!

See you there :)

End of the Summer Party!!!

That's the business bitches! It's time for another big party @ the Goat Ranch. Act like you know cousin! September 1st is the jump off. What's the party for? . . Who gives sparkly shit, just be there.

Rumor has it, we will have plenty O' beer, music, and a big enough house for the masses. We'll have some hard and mixers, but we do advise you bring your own hard liquor. Cuz that shit goes fast like a nascar, ya unda-dig what I'm talkin bout.

Now If you don't know where the Goat Ranch is located, you bes ask-ed somebodies. Call us, txt us, email us, send a MySpace, throw up the "Bat Signal", do what ya like just be there.

September 1st, that's a Saturday. It's the first Saturday of the month. Make a calender event if you have to. Shit!

Ok now for an important message: First off I would like to say NO DRAMA! Seriously bitches! I will fucking cut you. Don't come unless you coming to party. If you come to fight, I will cut you! If you break something that I have to pay for, you will pay for it, and then I will cut you! If your fat ass runs thru my screen door, I will fucking cut you! Are we pretty much clear? Good!

Moving on, Beautiful ladies! Yeah I'm talkin to you. You are more than welcome to attend in droves! We run an equal opportunity party facility. So if you have an ugly friend, she can come (conditionally) but there will be no grenade jump'n over here playa! If she try'n ta gets lucky, she bes holla to that drunk nigga in the corner and stop look'n at me. Other than that, she will have to sit her ass in the car, or make a sandwich and park them shits on the couch, whiles you handle your business. Speaking of extracurricular activities, if there are any girls that plan on having sex or some sort of sex like act with any resident of the Goat Ranch on that night, please RSVP so we can pencil you in for a block of time. We do not want any overlap if people's feelings are gonna get hurt. . .again.

So to recap:

Sept. 1st - Goat Ranch - Beer, Music, Party - No Drama - Ugly Friends No Love - RSVP - No Worries Mate!

Sprache Yadada!

That Kanye Workout Plan

So as of late (the past month) I've been working out alot. You know, trying ta get swole for the ladies in all. I don't really got a strategy since I never took P.E. weight training, but I've never really been a sloutch, and I pretty much got it covered. I tell you this cuz I think it's a good idea for all you flabby bastards out there to try some physical exercise for a change. Lift weights, ride a bike, join a gym (and go!), walk your fat ass around the block. It's really all about your motivation to better your health and the way you look (to the ladies of course).

I don't care how much you do or how often you do it. Just do something for crying out loud. Also eating healthy is good idea as well. Now I'm not gonna preach carrot sticks and light mayonnaise to anyone. I personally never eat anything that's green if possible. Plus I happen to be blessed with a high metabolism (and rugged man-pretty looks). Ok so all I'm saying is, if not for yourself and your health. . . . Do it for all the sexy ladies out there who you could be dry hump'n on Tuesdays. Now who's coming with me?!

Oh Ladies! don't think I forgot about youz.....

I'm just say'n, just cuz you bought that Tae-Bo VHS tape don't mean Billy Blanks is coming to your house to get your fat ass off the couch. Same rules apply for those without penis's. Get on that expensive ass treadmill that's taking up the whole back room and "west side walk it out" like them young folks be say'n.

Tho I do have an alternative for some of you ladies.......Two words......Stripper Pole.

That's right young'n, go out and get yourself a stripper pole. I'm sure if you already have a man he will get you one in a heartbeat if you ask. Hell he's been waiting for this day his whole life!

Now like with most things in life you have your different options in Poles. Your Built in version, your semi-portable with stage version, and your very portable "see you at my house" version. All very good and all very true to the life style. Also if you wanna make if official for me your dude, you gotta come with the outfit. I'm talk'n shoes and. . . . . what else do stripper have on again? (I kid, I kid) But I digress. Get the shoes and lacey outfit, throw on some stripper parafanilia. Or don't... actually we really don't care. Once you got the pole we are already living the dream. None the less, you will not be sorry and neither will the lucky fella you put it on and take it off for. I don't go to the titty bars myself that much, but if I don't come out smell'n like hooker spit and cigarette butts then someone was not on their A game. Don't let that be you ladies...





Wow! What a turn of events this post has taken.. Mer ha ha ha ha (evil laugh)

Your one stop shop!

Welp, I finally got some pictures up from Brocaveli's Birthday party at Pepper Belly's. So that's cool. Tom came thru with the shots, so thank him when you see him. I put like 64 of them up, even tho there was more. Whatever yo!

Brandon (you all know Brandon right?) Put a new forum up today. He's been buggin me to do one for like since I made this website. I guess he finally got tired of waitin and made his own. Check it out HERE or copy the link to your browser son. http://somethingtodo.17.forumer.com/

Oh So Paul is getting married (again) on Saturday (07/07/07 - whatever!). Expect some interesting pics from that up soon as well. Yeah this kid is getting hitched at the Goat Ranch, NO SHIT! There is a long and re-dic-u-lass story behind the whole thing, but it's all good in the end I guess. So who's comin anyway? It's gonna be like 104 on Saturday. I don't know, but I know it'll be hot as shit son. Oh my our backyard is not known for it's grassy knowls and shadey tree's. Bring your umbrella kids! All I know is that I'm suited up for like 50-60 minutes MAX! Then back to the civi's and possibly back to my room ($175 broker for a hot ass zoot suite).

The wedding starts at 6:30 prompt so be here on time. I really don't wanna wait around for you ass cousin!

Kimbo with the tap win?

Just wanted to put up the Kimbo Ray fight for anybro who hasn't seen it.

The full fight kids....all 15 minutes, and that's mostly talking.

I can't believe he won cuz ah submit! Who saw that coming? I knew he would win, but not by a choke out. Now Ray ain't no joke with the size, just he's a boxer not a street fighter (a 46 years old boxer). The 36 years old Kimbo is a beast, but I still think he'd get beat by a pro MMA fighter his size. The fight was so fast that we really didn't get to see if Kimbo would tire out, but then again who knows.

Well just watch it.....

Kimbo vs Mercer HQ & Full !!!

Stealthy Goat 2.0 beta

If you wondering why there hasn't been any new posts, it's because I finally decided to move over to a new blogging program. I am currently using "Blogger" owned by Google. This program is great if you are hosted on their servers. Since my blog is incorporated into my server, they don't let you reap any of the benefits they offer to their hosted blogs. Plus they don't make any plug-ins for the old blogger but they won't let me use the new blogger shit the way my site is.

I managed to find a new software that has everything I need built in or comes in a plug-ins. This one is made by "Wordpress", but it's the open source version not hosted by wordpress.com. The only problem is that I have to totally configure the bitch from scratch. Plus I had to import all my other posts over to the new blog. In simple yet painful terms let me explain how this is done.

• Step 1. Upload my blog to the Google servers: so now my blog is called "thestealthygoat.blogspot.com"


• Step 2. Sign up for a wordpress.com account.


• Step 3. Import my blog into wordpress: so now my blog is called "thestealthygoat.wordpress.com"


• Step 4. Install the wordpress.org open source software on my server


• Step 5. Import my blog into wordpress on my server: so now my blog is located at "stealthygoat.com/Blog"

Now what I'm doing is fixing all the old posts and links so they still work, configuring the users on my new blog, editing the format and style so it looks good, slapping bitches, finding good plug-ins so my side bar looks and works good, and still trying to keep you kids up to date.
I personally think this new shit will work out much better. What's gonna suck is when they come out with a new version and I have to update....

Stay tuned kiddies

Tahoe Trip 2007

I know, I know...I've been laggin' on doing the Tahoe post! I was waiting until I got some pictures to post along with it, but I guess I'll just tell the scoop, and post pics later.

Started off Friday night with a little buffet action in Harrah's. Now I'm not big on buffets (contrary to what mister Turner might say) but this one was mighty good! It had everything. Sushi, spaghetti, prime rib...whatever, you get the picture..there was alot of fucking food! So after I violated everything my doctor told me not to eat, we proceeded to drink everything in Tahoe. I stuck to the Crown on the rocks, but there was plenty of beer, Patron and other spirits floating around. Played a little poker, craps and blackjack, but ultimately ended up in the club. This my friends, could not have been a bigger mistake. While we were 15 deep, so gonna have good times regardless, the platypus options were not there! So we all proceeded to get extra hammered, while Biv and Brandon got their poker on! When I say got their poker on, I of course mean losing big $$. We ended the night at about 3am and headed to the cabin for a bit of sleep....or so we thought. Sleep is overrated anyway. Why sleep when you can get up at 6:30 in the morning and start drinking. Fuck it!!!

Headed to the casino at about 1 pm Saturday, and I proceeded to dominate the poker world of Tahoe, by winning a no-limit tourney. That's right Brandon, I fucking won. Check the tournament records baby!! Who's the big winner....Tony's the big fuckin winner!!! Later in the evening we all headed to club VEX, and proceeded to blow about $1500 on VIP status and drinks. I of course felt like shit, so headed home early, but I understand that fun was to be had. Between the Patron shots and the strippers, and my boy Pick passing out in the B of A parking lot 2 miles from the cabin, I think they had a good fucking time!! They all rolled in at about 4am, and passed the fuck out.

I know that this is has been a really quick and uneventful post, but I promise I'll get the pics out asap. Until I do that...what what...in the butt! Llama, out!

This weekend

As you can see this is still a major work in progress. I've managed to get my blog part pretty dialed, so after I get the colors right I will get the other pages working.

In BMX news. The Mountain Dew actions sports tour was in San Jose this weekend (I missed it of course). Scotty Cramner won "Park" and Jamie Bestwick won "Vert". Not sure who won "Dirt" but I think it was an Aussie. **Note(The Aussie in question was Ryan Guettler)

In Drunk news. I had a few drinks last night and woke up with a kick ass headache and 2 blondes in my bed. Just kidding, I really didn't have a headache.

Stay Classy!